Chapter: The Prohibition of Mutual Hatred, Severing Ties, and Turning Away from One Another

[Commentary]
Imam al-Nawawī, may Allah have mercy on him, titles this section of Riyāḍ al-Ṣāliḥīn: “Chapter on the prohibition of mutual hatred, severing relations, and turning one’s back on one another.”

Mutual hatred (tabāghuḍ) is a matter of the heart; severing ties (taqāṭuʿ) takes place through deeds and words alike; and turning away (tadābur) likewise manifests in actions. As for hatred of the heart, it is for a person to resent his believing brother, and I mean—hating a believer is unlawful. Why should you hate him? Someone might say, “I hate him because he disobeys Allah.” We reply: even when he disobeys Allah you must not detest him absolutely. The one whom you may hate without reservation is the unbeliever, for he possesses no good. A believer, however—even if he sins and persists in sin—must be loved for the faith he carries and disliked for the sin and transgression he commits.

If someone asks, “How can love and hatred coexist?” we answer: they coexist because each is directed at a different aspect; they do not converge in a single place. I love him for his faith and I hate him for his wickedness.

An illustration is the patient who is given a bitter medicine with a foul smell. He loves the medicine in one sense and detests it in another: he loves it for the cure it brings and hates it for its taste or odor. Likewise, you and that believing sinner share the same root—faith—so why would you hate him unconditionally? Dislike him only for the sin he carries—there is no harm in that—yet love him for the faith he possesses. Loving him for his faith while disliking him for his transgression will move you to advise him, for you are confident he is your brother. You love him and extend to him what you extend to yourself, so you counsel him regarding the sin you despise in him.

One expression of that counsel is to greet him with salām—even if he is committing a sin—unless you know that if you