Next, the author cites the ḥadīth of ʿĀʾishah, who said, “I never felt jealous of any of the Prophet’s wives as I felt jealous of Khadījah.” Protective jealousy (ghayrah) is a reaction that wells up in a person when he wants some affection to belong exclusively to him; hence the term ghayrah, for he dislikes that the beloved be shared with another. Co-wives, therefore, are the most jealous of all people.

ʿĀʾishah was the Beloved of the Messenger of Allah ﷺ, and after Khadījah he did not love anyone as he loved her. Yet he also loved Khadījah deeply, for she was the mother of all his children—except Ibrāhīm, who was from Māriyah—and because she had stood by him at the very beginning of the revelation, supported him, and spent her wealth on him. For that reason he never forgot her.

Thus, whenever he was in Madinah and slaughtered a sheep, he would send portions of its meat as gifts to Khadījah’s friends. ʿĀʾishah could not contain herself and said, “Messenger of Allah, it is as though there were no woman in the world but Khadījah!”

He replied, “She was what she was,” meaning, “She used to do this and that,” and he enumerated some of her virtues. “And from her I had children,” for all his offspring—four daughters and three sons—were from her except one son, Ibrāhīm, who was from Māriyah the Copt presented to him by the ruler of Egypt. Because all his other children were from Khadījah, he said, “She was what she was, and from her I had children.”

The lesson in this ḥadīth is that honoring the friend of a deceased person counts as honoring and showing piety toward the deceased himself—whether that deceased is a parent, a spouse, a friend, or a relative. To show kindness to the dead person’s friend is to show kindness to the dead person.