do any of the three options mentioned, she must fast three days instead; that is better for her, and she should not carry out the vow.
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Fulfilling a forbidden vow
Question: I have given birth to several daughters but no son, so I vowed that if Allah granted me a male child I would visit the grave of al-ʿAbbās every year. Allah did indeed bless me with a son. Is it permissible for me to fulfil my vow, and if not, what must I do?
Answer: It is not permissible to fulfil this vow, because it is a vow to commit a sin. Moreover, it is forbidden for a woman to visit graves, for the Prophet ﷺ said, “May Allah curse the women who habitually visit graves,” and in another wording, “May Allah curse the women who visit graves and those who build places of worship and set up lamps over them.” Visiting graves is legislated only for men, not for women. Therefore, if a woman vows to visit graves, or to visit a specific grave, it is impermissible for her to carry out that vow, for it is a sinful vow. The Prophet ﷺ also said, “Whoever makes a vow to obey Allah must obey Him, and whoever makes a vow to disobey Him must not disobey Him.”