Deeds That Benefit One’s Parents

Question: Which deeds avail and benefit one’s parents, whether they are alive or have passed away? Please clarify this for us, and may Allah reward you with goodness.

Answer: The deeds that benefit parents while they are alive are, first and foremost, dutifulness toward them and treating them with excellence in both word and deed. This means fulfilling whatever they need—expenses, lodging, and the like—keeping them company, speaking kindly to them, and serving them in every possible way during their lifetime.

Showing them kindness in every word and action is obligatory, for Allah the Exalted says: “Your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him, and that you show kindness to parents.” (Al-Isrāʾ 17:23). This duty becomes even more pressing when they reach old age, or when one of them does so in your care; at that point the child must be gentle, patient, and generous toward them. Allah says: “If one of them or both of them attain old age in your presence, do not even say ‘Uff’ to them, nor repel them; rather, speak to them noble words. Lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy, and say, ‘My Lord, have mercy on them just as they raised me when I was small.’” (Al-Isrāʾ 17:23–24).

Accordingly, a child must honor his parents in every conceivable way while they are alive—especially when they become elderly, weak, and in need of his service and help.

After they have passed away, dutifulness toward them continues through: supplicating for them, giving charity on their behalf, performing Hajj and ʿUmrah for them, paying any debts they may have left, maintaining the ties of kinship connected to them, honoring their friends—because that pleases and comforts them—and slaughtering the Eid al-Adḥā sacrifice (udhiyah) on their behalf. All of these remain forms of honoring one’s parents after their death.