As for the arrangement you mention—placing a copy of the Qur’an between you and the woman in order to agree to marry—this is nothing but superstition and an innovation; it is not a lawful Islamic contract. A woman is not permitted to marry herself off or to conclude a contract on her own behalf; rather, her guardian (walī) must conduct the contract for her. Since, as you have described, there is contention between your relatives and hers, it is better to keep away from this match. Women are many: Allah will grant her a husband suited to her circumstances, and He will grant you a wife suited to yours—without dispute and without becoming embroiled in problems.
The Presence of a Guardian Is a Condition for a Valid Marriage
Question: I am a young man who have been working in the Kingdom for seven years, and I pray and fast—praise be to Allah. A year ago I got married, but the girl had no guardian; she has only a sister. When we went to the court, they refused to allow her sister to act as her guardian. Some time later I married her in the presence of three witnesses, but without an official contract from the court. Six months afterward a marriage certificate reached me from my homeland, issued by a sharīʿah court, even though neither I nor my wife had been present; we obtained it through a power of attorney executed on behalf of both of us in the other country. Is this marriage, in its present form, valid or not? If it is not valid, what must we do to correct it?
Answer: It is well known that one of the conditions for the validity of a marriage is the presence of a guardian who concludes the contract on behalf of the woman under his care. If she has no guardian among her agnate relatives, then her guardian is the sharīʿah judge, who undertakes her affairs and concludes the contract for her.
As for the contract the questioner mentioned, it is questionable; we do not know in what manner it was carried out, for he says that the woman had no guardian except her sister and that the court rejected the sister’s guardianship,