- Kindness to the bride when consummating the marriage:
It is recommended that, when a man first enters upon his wife, he treat her gently—for example, by offering her something to drink. This is based on the ḥadīth of Asmāʾ bint Yazīd ibn al-Sakan, who said:
“I adorned1 ʿĀʾishah for the Messenger of Allah ﷺ, then I went to him and invited him to her unveiling2. He came and sat beside her. A large bowl3 of milk was brought; he drank from it and then offered it to her, but she lowered her head and felt shy. Asmāʾ said, ‘So I reproached her and said, “Take it from the hand of the Prophet ﷺ.”’ She took it and drank a little. The Prophet ﷺ then said to her, ‘Give it to your companion4.’
Asmāʾ continued, ‘I said, “O Messenger of Allah, rather drink from it yourself and then hand it to me.” He took it, drank from it, and then passed it to me. I sat down, placed it on my knee, and began to rotate the bowl, tracing the rim with my lips where his had touched.’