for men—an adornment that the Sacred Law does not disapprove of—and in a fitting manner. Allah is fully aware of what you do.

Observing mourning is a duty for a woman during the waiting period following her husband’s death. As for a woman observing a waiting period after divorce, there are distinctions: if her divorce is revocable, she is not required to observe mourning during the waiting period, since she may wear that which will incline her husband’s heart toward her, so that he may take her back. Regarding a woman irrevocably divorced through khulʿ (a wife-initiated divorce) or through three pronouncements of divorce, there are two views. One is that she must observe mourning, like a woman whose husband has died. This was the view of Saʿid ibn al-Musayyib and was also held by Abu Hanifah. The other is that she is not required to observe mourning. This was the view of ʿAtaʾ and was also held by Malik.

“There is no blame upon you for what you allude to in proposing marriage to women, or for what you conceal within yourselves. Allah knows that you will have them in mind; but do not make secret promises to them, except that you speak fitting words. And do not resolve upon the marriage bond until the prescribed term has reached its end. Know that Allah knows what is within yourselves, so beware of Him; and know that Allah is Most Forgiving, Most Forbearing.” (235)

Allah’s saying, exalted is He, “There is no blame upon you for what you allude to in proposing marriage to women,” refers to women observing a waiting period. The basis of allusion is to hint at something. In speech, it is that by which the listener understands one’s intention without an explicit statement. An indirect proposal of marriage is permitted during the waiting period. Thus, a man may say: “Perhaps there is someone desirous of you”; “Who could find anyone like you?”; “You are beautiful”; “You are righteous”; “You would be precious to me”; “I am interested in you”; “One of my aims is to marry”; “If Allah joins me to you in lawful marriage, I would be pleased”; or, “If I marry you, I shall certainly treat you well”—and similar words—without saying, “Marry me.” If she is interested in him, the woman may respond in a similar manner.

Ibrahim said: “There is no harm in giving her a gift and attending to her affairs during the waiting period, if she is suitable for him.”

It is related that Sukaynah bint Hanzalah became irrevocably separated from her husband. Abu Jaʿfar Muhammad ibn ʿAli al-Baqir entered upon her during her waiting period and said: “Daughter of Hanzalah, you know my kinship to the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, the claim my grandfather has upon me, and my long-standing commitment to Islam.” Sukaynah said: “Are you proposing marriage to me while I am in my waiting period, when religious knowledge is taken from you?” He replied: “I have only informed you of my kinship to the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace. The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, entered upon Umm Salamah while she was observing the waiting period following the death of her husband, Abu Salamah, and mentioned to her his rank with Allah, exalted is He. He was leaning heavily upon his hand, until the mat left a mark on it from the force with which he was supporting himself.” (1)

An indirect proposal of marriage is permitted during the waiting period following a husband’s death. As for a woman observing a waiting period because of a separation during her husband’s lifetime, there are distinctions. If she is a woman whom the husband from whom she has separated may no longer marry—such as a woman divorced three times, or one separated through mutual imprecation or fosterage—then it is permissible to propose to her indirectly. If she is a woman whom her husband may marry again, such as one divorced through khulʿ or whose marriage has been annulled, then her husband may propose to her both indirectly and explicitly.

As for another man, may he propose to her indirectly? There are two views. One is that it is permissible, just as it is in the case of a woman divorced three times. The other is that it is not permissible, because resuming the marriage belongs to the man for whom she is observing the waiting period, as in the case of a revocably divorced woman; thus, another man may not indirectly propose marriage to her.

Allah’s saying, “in proposing marriage to women”: a proposal of marriage is the seeking of marriage. It is a verbal noun derived from a man’s proposing marriage to a woman. Al-Akhfash said: “Kḥitbah means mention, while khutbah means the testimony of faith.” Accordingly, its meaning is: what you have alluded to by mentioning women in their presence. “Or what you conceal”: that is, what you hide within yourselves of the desire to marry them. One may say either “I concealed the matter” or “I hid the matter”; both are valid forms. Thaʿlab said: “The former means that I hid the matter within myself, while the latter means that I covered it.” Al-Suddi said: “It is for a man to enter, greet her, and give her a gift, if...”