Those who held that household service is obligatory argued that this was the custom known to the very people whom Allah addressed with His revelation. As for pampering the woman so that the husband serves her—sweeping, grinding grain, kneading dough, washing, making the beds and carrying out the work of the house—this, they said, is objectionable. Allah the Exalted says, “And women have rights similar to the obligations upon them, according to what is fair” (al-Baqarah 2:228) (1), and He says, “Men are caretakers over women” (al-Nisāʾ 4:34) (2). If the wife does not serve him and he instead becomes her servant, then she is the one who holds authority over him. Ibn al-Qayyim continued: Allah, glorified be He, only made it obligatory upon the husband to provide her maintenance, clothing and housing in return for his enjoyment of her, her service, and what spouses customarily practice.

Moreover, unrestricted contracts are to be understood in light of prevailing custom, and the custom is that the wife serves and attends to the household’s internal affairs. He further said: It is impermissible to distinguish between a woman of noble birth and one of humble origin, or between the poor and the wealthy; for the most honoured woman in all creation—namely Fāṭimah (may Allah be pleased with her)—used to serve her husband. She once came to the Prophet ﷺ complaining about the hardship of service, yet he did not excuse her from it. End quote.

When a wife notices that her husband no longer desires her while she wishes to remain with him: how should she handle the situation?

Q: If a woman sees that her husband has lost interest in her and she still wants to stay with him, how should she deal with the matter?
A: Allah the Exalted says, “If a woman fears from her husband contempt or abandonment, there is no blame upon the two of them if they make terms of reconciliation between themselves, and reconciliation is best” (al-Nisāʾ 4:128).