Book of Marriage
Marriage is recommended for anyone who feels sexual desire; it becomes obligatory if he fears falling into zinā (fornication); and it is merely permissible for one who has no desire. When desire is present, marriage is better than supererogatory acts of worship.
It is recommended (1) to marry one devout, unrelated, virgin woman who is able to bear children. The suitor may look at whatever normally remains visible of the woman he wishes to propose to, and of any woman who is his maḥram (permanently unmarriageable relative).
A direct proposal is forbidden to a woman who is observing ʿiddah (her waiting period), even when that period is due to widowhood; an indirect, allusive proposal is nevertheless allowed when her separation from her former husband is irrevocable. Both direct and indirect proposals are permissible to a woman who has already become baʾin from him in a way that still leaves her lawful for him, and the same rulings apply to her reply.
An example of indirect speech is, “I am certainly interested in someone like you,” and she might answer, “No one would turn away from you,” and so forth.
It is forbidden to propose after a Muslim’s proposal has already been accepted— even if his proposal was only an indirect hint—unless he has been refused, has granted permission, or the circumstances are unknown.
It is recommended to conclude the marriage contract on Friday evening, preceded by the sermon narrated from Ibn Masʿūd.
Section
The contract has two essential pillars:
- The offer (ījāb) with the wording, “ankaḥtu” or “zawwajt,” and
- The acceptance (qabūl) with the wording, “qabiltu,” “raḍītu,” “tazawwajtuhā,” or the like.
For anyone who is proficient in Arabic the contract is not valid if different wording is used; one who is not proficient is not obliged to learn Arabic.