to provide for him, or else to sell him.
5 – After that comes the mother, for the hardship she bears for her children is greater than that of the father: pregnancy, childbirth, nursing, custody, and all the other affairs involved in raising and caring for them. Next comes the father, because of his paternity and the magnitude of his right.
6 – Then comes the maintenance of other relatives. Among them, the one with the strongest claim is given precedence according to the order of inheritance. This applies when resources are limited and cannot cover everyone—like the man who possessed only a single dinar in the ḥadith. When a person is affluent, however, he must provide for them all, seeking the reward for that expenditure from Allah Almighty so that he may attain good in both this world and the hereafter: in this world, increase, growth, affection, love, and prayers on his behalf; and in the hereafter, tremendous reward and abundant recompense. All of this is conditioned on sincerity for Allah’s sake, and on avoiding reminders of one’s favors and all forms of ostentation.
7 – The ḥadith places the mother ahead of the father—let alone anyone else—in dutiful conduct, because she endures hardships with the fetus and then with the child that no one else endures.
8 – The two ḥadiths show that spending on oneself and on one’s relatives is an act of beneficence and filial devotion whose benefit reaches others, and that, when accompanied by the intention of seeking reward, it becomes a noble act of worship and a great means of drawing near to Allah.
Al-Bukhārī and Muslim relate—on the authority of Abū Masʿūd al-Badrī—that the Prophet ﷺ said: “When a man spends on his family, hoping for reward, it counts for him as charity.”
They likewise narrate from Umm Salamah, who said: “I asked, ‘Messenger of Allah, do I have a reward for spending on the children of Abū Salamah? I cannot simply leave them; after all, they are my children.’ He replied, ‘Yes, you will have the reward for whatever you spend on them.’”
There are many other aḥādīth on this subject.
In the end, everything revolves around a sound intention and a noble purpose that transforms an ordinary habit into an act of worship for which its doer is rewarded. Allah’s help is sought.