and can distinguish a righteous suitor from one who is not; only then does her permission carry weight and meaning. Such a woman is the one whose consent must be sought.
- A minor girl is neither consulted nor asked for permission, because doing so serves no purpose.
Ibn Daqīq al-ʿĪd said: “Permission is only sought from one who is legally entitled to give it; therefore the hadith applies exclusively to those who have reached legal adulthood.”
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Shaykh al-Islām stated: “The correct criterion for compulsion is minority. A virgin who has attained adulthood may not be forced by anyone into marriage. To regard mere virginity as grounds for compulsion contradicts the fundamentals of Islam.”
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With a virgin, her silence suffices as consent, for modesty usually keeps her from speaking openly. It is preferable, however, to fix a specific period during which she may voice any objection, so that she knows that once that time has elapsed her silence will be deemed approval; thereafter her silence counts as permission and agreement.
I say: The rule that “her silence is her consent” applied in bygone generations, but nowadays girls have their own say in the matter of marriage.
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Shaykh al-Islām also said: “If a girl’s hymen is ruptured by a jump, the insertion of a finger, or the like, she is still considered a virgin according to the four Imams. If she becomes non-virgin through fornication, then according to al-Shāfiʿī and Aḥmad she is treated like a previously-married woman with respect to marriage, whereas Abū Ḥanīfah and Mālik view her as a virgin, and Abū Ḥanīfah’s two disciples hold that she is like a previously-married woman by lawful marriage.”
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When consulting a previously-married woman or seeking a virgin’s permission, it is not sufficient merely to inform her of the marriage and the suitor’s name. She must instead be fully apprised of the prospective husband—his character, religiosity, age, appearance, lineage, wealth, occupation, and any other factor relevant to her welfare that might incline her either toward accepting him or turning him down.
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Shaykh al-Islām said: “If a woman has a blood guardian, that is, an agnate relative, he may contract her marriage with her permission, and no judge is required—this is agreed upon by the scholars. If she has no guardian at all, then her marriage may be contracted by the senior figure of the locality, the judge’s deputy, or the regional governor….”