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If he says, “You are forbidden to me,” or, “You are like my mother’s back,” this constitutes ẓihār—a declaration likening one’s wife to a woman permanently unmarriageable to him—even if he intends divorce by it. The same applies if he says, “Whatever Allah has made lawful for me is forbidden . . .”

His statement, “If he says: ‘You are forbidden to me,’” is the most important issue in this chapter. If a man addresses his wife by saying, “You are forbidden to me,” there are only three possibilities: he either intends divorce, ẓihār, or an oath.

According to the stronger view, if he says to his wife, “You are forbidden to me,” intending thereby merely to state something rather than to bring it about, we say to him: “You have lied; this has no effect,” for she is lawful to him. It is like saying, “This bread is forbidden to me,” while merely stating something rather than declaring it forbidden. We would say: “You have lied; it is lawful, and you may eat it.”

But if he intends thereby to bring about her prohibition, then, if he intends divorce by it, it is a divorce, since the expression can serve as a divorce. If he intends ẓihār by it, then it is ẓihār; and if he intends an oath by it, then it is an oath.

The difference between these three matters is that, when he intends an oath by it, he does not intend to render her forbidden; rather, he intends abstention, whether conditionally or unconditionally. For example, if he says, “If you do such-and-such, you are forbidden to me,” this is conditional. He does not mean to render his wife forbidden; rather, he intends that she refrain from doing that. Likewise, when he says, “You are forbidden to me,” his intent is to abstain from his wife. We therefore say: this is an oath, due to Allah’s saying:

“O Prophet, why do you prohibit what Allah has made lawful for you, seeking the approval of your wives? And Allah is Forgiving and Merciful. Allah has already ordained for you the dissolution of your oaths.” [al-Taḥrīm: 1–2]

His saying, “what Allah has made lawful for you”: the word “what” is a relative pronoun conveying generality. It therefore includes one’s wife, slave woman, food, drink, and clothing. Thus, its ruling is that of an oath. Ibn Abbas (may Allah be pleased with him) said: “If he says to his wife, ‘You are forbidden to me,’ then it is”