Al-Sharḥ al-Mumtiʿ - Ibn al-'Uthaymin - (12/440)

Al-Sharḥ al-MumtiʿIbn al-'Uthaymin

Chapter: Marital Disobedience

Marital disobedience is her disobeying him in what she is obliged to do. Thus, when signs of it appear from her—such as her refusing to respond to him for intimacy, or responding resentfully or unwillingly—he should admonish her, ……….

The author has included this chapter to explain marital disobedience. Such disobedience may come from the husband or from the wife. Allah, Exalted is He, says:

“Those women from whom you fear marital disobedience...” [Quran 4:34]

And Allah, Exalted is He, says:

“And if a woman fears marital disobedience or aversion from her husband...” [Quran 4:128]

His statement, “Marital disobedience is her disobeying him in what she is obliged to do,” defines marital disobedience. Its root is derived from nashaz, namely, an elevated part of the ground. From this is what the scholars mention concerning the rites of pilgrimage: when one ascends an elevated place, one recites the talbiyah. The connection between the literal and tangible meaning is clear: the woman raises herself above her husband, acts haughtily toward him, and fails to fulfil his rights.

In the Sacred Law, however, he says: “her disobeying him.” “Disobeying” is a verbal noun attributed to its subject, while “him” is the object of that verbal noun. That is, her disobeying her husband regarding the rights of his that she is obligated to fulfil. As for something that she is not obligated to do, it is not marital disobedience, even if she explicitly states that she refuses to obey him. For example, if he says to her, “I want you to become a broker in the marketplace and sell,” and she says no, she is not obliged to do so. Likewise, if he says, “I want you to work as a servant for other people,” she is not obliged to do that. The author then gave examples of this, saying:

“Thus, when signs of it appear from her—such as her refusing to respond to him for intimacy”: that is, he calls her to intimacy and she refuses, or he wishes to enjoy intimacy with her through kissing or otherwise and she refuses. Such a woman is maritaly disobedient.

The apparent meaning of his statement, “such as her refusing to respond to you for intimacy,” is that if she refuses to

فَصْلٌ النُّشُوزُ مَعْصِيَتُهَا إِيَّاهُ فِيمَا يَجِبُ عَلَيْهَا، فَإِذَا ظَهَرَ مِنْهَا أَمَارَاتُهُ، بِأَنْ لَا تُجِيبَهُ إِلَى الاسْتِمْتَاعِ، أَوْ تُجِيبَهُ مُتَبَرِّمَةً، أَوْ مُتَكَرِّهَةً، وَعَظَهَا، .......... هذا الفصل عقده المؤلف لبيان النشوز، والنشوز يكون من الزوج، ويكون من الزوجة، قال الله تعالى: ﴿وَاللاَّتِي تَخَافُونَ نُشُوزَهُنَّ﴾ [النساء: ٣٤]، وقال الله تعالى: ﴿وَإِنِ امْرَأَةٌ خَافَتْ مِنْ بَعْلِهَا نُشُوزًا أَوْ إِعْرَاضًا﴾ [النساء: ١٢٨]. قوله: «النشوز معصيتها إياه فيما يجب عليها»، هذا ضابط النشوز، وأصله مأخوذ من النشز، وهو المرتفع من الأرض، ومنه ما ذكره أهل العلم في المناسك إذا علا نشزاً فإنه يلبي، ومناسبة المعنى للمحسوس ظاهرة؛ لأن المرأة تترفع على زوجها وتتعالى عليه، ولا تقوم بحقه. أما شرعاً فيقول: «معصيتها إياه»، «معصية» مصدر مضافٌ إلى فاعله، «وإياه» مفعول المصدر، أي: معصيتها الزوج فيما يجب عليها من حقوقه، أما ما لا يجب فإن ذلك ليس بنشوز، ولو صرحت بمعصيته، فلو قال لها: أريد منك أن تصبحي دلاَّلة في السوق تبيعين فقالت: لا، ما يلزمها، ولو قال: أريد منكِ أن تكوني خادمة عند الناس، فلا يلزمها، ثم ضرب المؤلف أمثلة لهذا فقال: «فإذا ظهر منها أماراته، بأن لا تجيبه إلى الاستمتاع»، يعني دعاها إلى الاستمتاع فأبت، أو أراد أن يستمتع بها بتقبيل أو غيره فأبت، فهذه ناشز. وظاهر قوله: «بأن لا تجيبيه إلى الاستمتاع» أنها لو أبت أن