This ruling given by Ka‘b ibn Sawwar in Umar’s presence—may Allah be pleased with him—and approved by him constitutes proof by virtue of Umar’s approval, since he was one of the Rightly Guided Caliphs.

Some scholars have said that he is obliged to spend the night with her in a manner recognized as proper, due to Allah’s saying: “Live with them in kindness.” It is not proper for the husband to remain in a separate room for three nights out of four, and then spend one night with this wife. Everyone recognizes this as inequity. The fact that he is only obliged to give her one night when he has four wives does not mean that he is not obliged to give her more when he has only one wife. For his being obliged to give her only one night when he has four wives arises from the necessity of maintaining fairness: each of them must have one night out of four. This differs from the case where she is his only wife and has no co-wife; then the ruling differs, and he must spend the night with her according to customary practice.

It appears that customary practice would be close to what Ka‘b ibn Sawwar ruled when there is mutual contention and dispute. As for counsel, guidance, and sincere advice, the husband should be advised and told: This is your wife, and you should not forsake her, for Allah the Exalted says: “As for those women whose defiance you fear, admonish them, and forsake them in their beds.” [al-Nisa’ 4:34] But when there is no fear of defiance, he should not forsake her—not even for a single night—unless this is customary practice. This view is the correct one.

His statement, “and he may be alone,” is necessarily read in the nominative, because the conjunction here either begins a new clause or joins it to “he is obliged.” If we were to read it in the accusative, we would make it obligatory for him to remain alone during the remainder.